To all those in the rest of the world, the Eurovision song contest is an annual onslaught of shite music for the European masses.

In the U.K, it is widely regarded as being terrible but the rest of Europe, particularly the ex-eastern bloc countries seem to take it seriously. Terry Wogan usually narrates the event offering a sarcastic commentary for the U.K. Graham Norton took over this year and was better than I expected.

“Now there is going to be a wonderful aftershow party. I’d like to wear a dress made of cheap wrapping paper, I wonder where I could borrow one.” Graham Norton

The second half of the competition in which the different European countries award points to the acts is considered the only watchable part by most cultured countries. Normally all neighboring countries just vote for each other but this didn’t happen so much this year and the U.K came in the top 5 for the first time in years, coincidence or because we pulled out of Iraq?

Ukraine’s entry to the 2007 Eurovision song contest. The key change gave me internal hemorrhaging.